Sunday, January 31, 2010

The truth.

Hello. I should be sleeping now. I slept around 330am just now & woke up at 430am. Talked on the phone with ze bestfriend & now i cant continue sleeping. Damn. -_-' Its 528am now for Gods sake, Sofia! Haish. So to kill the time & make sure im sleepy, im here, blogging. :)

Today is the last day of the first month of 2010. Its kind of sad, knowing that its going to be February in less than 24 hours. Not knowing the time, its gonna be the end of 2010 already. Then im gonna be 20 next year. How time flies right? I want to be 18 forever. & when i mean 18, its the time when all the school leavers do is hanging out & finish up parents money. Hahaha. How i miss that time. Well what to do, we cant pause time. & we dont do rewind & fast forward. So what can i do is just, go on with this life.

Hmm. Have you ever felt like, you are already on the top of the world but suddenly you hear yourself screaming for help. & next thing you know, you are already on your way down, with your heart crushed, your eyes, mind & everything blurred? You know, ive been hurt too many times. Too many. Being in 4 different relationships makes me think, am i that bad? Am i that ugly? Dont i deserve to be treated as a woman, lady, girl, or whatever you want to call me? Im trauma, im afraid. I dont want to be fooled anymore. But me being me, i always fall in a guys trap. :) I have to be strong. Thats it. That is it.

I now have my own source of happiness. I have my family ; eventhough my family is not perfect but i have a loving & caring one. I have my 2 bestest girl friends ; who always stay with me eventhough they both are busy with their own life. I have my own best guy friend ; who currently listens to my stupid things everyday, laugh with me. I have my own close friends ; who never fails to make me happy & never want to see me depressed. I thank God for sending them all to be with me, through my nearly 19 years of living. I would never ask for more because i think i have enough already. But one thing makes me afraid is that ; losing all of them at once. I cant bare losing them. Seriously, ill break into pieces. So promise me, you guys will always be my favourite people. :')

I feel like crying now. I know why but i dont think ill write it here. Let it all be kept here, close to my heart. Let me be the only one who knows. Nobody else knows this besides myself. Im not gonna tell anybody about it. Well, the wall has been crushed. Now you know, im not always happy. :) But im gonna cherish this life, im gonna smile widely, im gonna make myself happy. Ill laugh more, ill smile more. That will keep me happy. All the time.



P/S : Please, dont you dare leave me now. Because without you, i know im not gonna survive. Thanks.
PP/S : Im not sleepy anymore. Shit. Whatever, sleep now, Sofia!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Maybe its because im irresistable. :)

Hello World ... Hope Youre Listening .... :)

I actually should go back to sleep & wake up at 1030, or 11 the latest. But blame myself for not doing that. I have class at 12 & its Marketing. Can you imagine the boringness? Haha :)

Well just a quick update of myself, i am currently loving my life. *Did you guys notice i always say i love my life? Well i do. I love 2010, so far. :)* I am currently taking up 6 subjects this semester & i hope i could get good results for the finals. Me & Uswah are trying to push ourselves to study everyday. Except for weekends, thats the time where we get to have a break from COLLEGE LIFE. Eventhough its only second semester, we still want to do our best. My first sem wasnt very pleasant, so this is the pay back time. Hihi.

Hmm. Oh & i am currently being a tuition teacher to my bestest friend, Saw Kah Chiun. *Not that im good in Maths. Its because im too irresistable, he just cant get enough of me. HAHAHAHAHA :p* Hes gonna have his finals in less than 2 weeks, so im kind of helping him to get himself prepared for the finals. While teaching him, i could study too. & im not gonna study if im home so the idea of him bringing me out to be his tutor is the best idea ever to get me started on my plan of semangat tinggi untuk belajar. *Know what? When i teach him i feel like im clever. Why? Because im happy i can get all the answers. Why? Because those things i teach him are like the high school syllabus. & im proud of myself i can still remember. BAHAHA*

& i noticed that ive been spending too little too much time with Azihanie this time around. *Not that im complaining, its just something that i want to share okay? Haha* Maybe its because Arlina is too caught up with her KMB stuffs & Nazrin is too busy with her assignments. I hope this Chinese New Year, we could get together & menggila again okay? Oh but i dont think ill be spending much time with Arlina as shes still gonna be busy eventhough its holiday. Hmm. Oh well, thats life. We are all in college, everybody is busy with their life. But i miss them, Nazrin & Arlina. :')

Something random :-

I think we should all stop complaining. Cherish everything thats with you right now. Nothing comes twice. Everything here, is here for a reason. Whether its bad or good, you learn from it. You make yourself happy by having anything now. I know i know, im saying this because i am living a wonderful life right now. But do you know whats happening inside me? Whats playing inside my head? Whats happening to my family? No. & i have my own family crisis. But what else could i do? I just can sit back, relax, hoping for a better tomorrow. Nothing is perfect. But you can just pretend it is & enjoy life while you can. We are all borrowing the soul & everything from Allah. One day, we have to give it back to Him. So while He still gives us the chance to be in this world, appreciate it. :)

& dont forget, KARMA IS A BITCH. & jangan doakan apa apa yang buruk untuk orang. Biar Allah je yang balas. :)



P/S : I have 2 stalkers right now. BIG TIME. Both. Tapi sorang i sayang *cough cough*, lagi sorang tak kenal. Kenal la, tapi tak la kenal sangat. Hahahaha.
PP/S : Everybody seems not moving on from me & Saw. Why eh? Nak kitorang couple betul betul ke? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Okay diam.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Kawan baik ; lelaki.



Sekarang ni i depend on him je. *Okay la, basically la, selain daripada my other girlfriends.* Everyday, memang selalu cari dia je. Sebab dia, i am still living my life, happily. Dia sweet, dia baik, dia hebat, dia memang menawan, dia cool, dia memang hebat la! *Okay i dont know why im praising you. :S Terima je okay? Haha* He knows how to make me laugh when im stressed out. I just feel like thanking him, for being there for me. When i was having my toughest time, he was there to make sure that im strong enough to go through my hard times. He is one great best friend. He knows his part & i know mine. We have been close since i broke up. & whats funny is everybody seems like not moving on from us. HAHA. Biar ditekankan disini, kami hanya kawan baik. :) But sometimes, i wonder, will we be like this till forever? I hope we do. I appreciate everything you do to me. & thanks for everything. I hope you wont be like some people okay? Who forgets after a while. :')

& a confession : Saya sayang awak, kawan. :|



P/S : Please dont get too excited, okay? Jangan bangga sangat. HAHA :p 

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Emosi.

Yes, im not hot nor pretty. Im not skinny too. Im fat, im ugly. That equals to fugly. & thats me. So what right? I have my family & friends. I dont need anybody like you in my life. :)



P/S : Sometimes, i feel like killing myself. I feel like i have no value to anybody.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Rebellious.

Budak budak sekarang dah maju. Bukan macam budak budak zaman dulu. Diorang sekarang suka memberontak, suka stand up for themselves. Mulut semua mulut puaka. HAHA. Bukan lah salah parents, tapi kadang kadang, budak budak tu kena jugak pandai pilih kawan. & tolong jangan batak sangat. & jangan cultural shock. Tapi tak semestinya budak KL tak cultural shock. Korang salah. Semua pun gila sekarang ni. Apa nak jadi dengan dunia ni? Haih. Dah la, penat. Sakit otak belajar accounts. Nak tidur. Bye!


P/S : Jangan terasa eh. Sebab sumpah post ni tak ditujukan to whoever la. Ni macam tiba tiba terlintas dekat kepala. :)

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Current Addiction : Vodka Bottles.



Look at the vodka bottles above. SO BEAUTIFUL RIGHT? LOL. I am now addicted to the vodka bottles. Oh dont get me wrong. I dont drink, i just love the bottles. Especially the red one & the rainbow colored above. :D

Hmm. & i am seriously losing my writing ability. Not that ive had one. HAHAH. :S Okay, serious talk lah okay. Hmm, i am now loving my life. With my friends & family with me, i feel like my life is complete. Eventhough its not perfect & it will never be, i am thankful that i still have both of my parents & my grandmother. The one & only. My friends who always be there for me, through thick & thin. However, i miss my high school life. I miss school ; not the study part but the part that we always see our friends everyday, not missing every single gossips & all. OMG, i so miss school a lot. :| & i miss being a 5 year old kid. :( I miss my same old Abah. & i miss being a daddys little girl. Hmm. Oh well, people change. & my dad? Hes transforming, 360 if you wanna know. :) Hmm enough about that.

I am now busy. Busy with classes, studies. & hanging outs. Lol. I have class everyday except for weekends & Tuesday. & my class on Friday is at 230-530pm. Sucks big time kan? Haish. But i hope i could get a higher CGPA for this sem. Im trying my best. I wanna go abroad. Pursuing my degree. AMINNNNNNNN! :)

& currently, im killing my time with hanging out with the bestfriend, Si Gila & classes je. I miss my two bestfriends too. & the Geng Bas Sekolah. :(

Sunday, January 10, 2010

SFM.

Im not sure about my feelings right now.

Anyhow, im loving every nano second of my life. :D

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Boo-hoo!

Ive run out of ideas to post it here. Im more active with tumblr. I rather not write much nowadays because i think theres nothing important & exciting in my writings. & with my life too. :)


Whatever it is, im now enjoying my single life. & im happy with it too. I hope theres nothing that could get into my happiness. But ill try not to be too happy. :) Hows your life treating you? Hows 2010 so far?


Oh btw, my class is starting this Wednesday. Boo hoo!

Friday, January 1, 2010

2010 it is.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, PEOPLE!


My last day of 2009 was great. Especially the part which we watched the Paranormal Activity together at Iylia's. *Iylia & Azie + me*. Ill miss 2009 but im surely looking forward on whats going to happen next in 2010. Oh, 2010 is the last teenage life for us 1991s. Hope itll be good. <3